lol whn u cming hre I nd 2 c ur fce
IF YOU TEXT ME ONE MORE SHORTENED VERSION OF A WORD, THE ONLY THING YOU'LL SEE IS MY FIST IN YOUR FACE.
When i woke up this morning she asked me 'when did you first find out that you could see the future.' I gotta stop drinking.
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
This freshman just ran out of her seat in a 200 person lecture, opened the emergency door and vommed everywhere. Then quietly went back to her seat. $2 Pitchers hit someone hard last night.
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
I think ppl see us as an unstoppable drunken force
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
I think I won over his best friend. He was staring at my boobs all night.
You were too drunk yesterday to deal with me crying so I am too drunk to deal with logic.
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
All that stuff they told us in middle school about drugs being easy to find was a bullshit lie.
hotelroom bed is big enough to masturbate in, but small enough to not want to sleep in it after you've masturbated in it
Randomize