it wouldnt have been so bad but she still had the cowboy hat on when my mom walked in
My roommate still talks on AIM. What is this middle school?
Woke up next to my bed in a pile of skittles, sleeping on a pair of sweatpants. I can't believe the girl didn't stick around..
I stole so many things from the ER last night.
We are having a competition to see who can masterbate in the wierdest place, right now hes winning since he masterbated on his Jr. High school bus.
Hundreds of bug bites..Dad jokingly says "looks like you passed out naked in the woods somewhere"
No you usually just ranted about the voicemail bitch until she cut you off again
Right but I don't wanna waste the whole weekend not having sex when we could be having sex
I'm having post-experience "why didn't I fuck her in a public bathroom" regrets
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
My roommate told me he found me naked in the shower puking and when he asked why I was naked I said "you can't wear clothes in a shower"
Grilled cheese and shark week. Unemployment done right.
If by whore you mean UPGRADE....then yes I am
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
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