Would you let Jessica Biel poop in front of you to see her naked...but you have to wipe her too?
direct quote: "i'm so over my clit" either best or most awkward conversation possible with your COUSIN
elementary school lunch room party. everyone brings their own lunch and can trade stuff. all juice is booze.
puking up blue gatorade is not as nearly as much fun as it sounds
i think you ate grass..but you refused to open your mouth so we could see..
I don't know what I wash first. My body or my puke painted car. People are judging me as I drive by.
I'm not drinking anymore...and by that, I mean until St. Patrick's Day.
Stoned, drunk, and walking into the library. Look at me multitasking!
I was stopped at a light on my way home and a priest threw holy water on my car. Seems fitting after last night.
Only ESPN could find the two ugly girls from a school in Florida
Also, my old intern Lizzie whom you fed pizza to last night wants to hang out with you
Many a woman has been in tears over the passing of my penis' whorish ways.
Riding your boyfriend's dick for an hour then waitressing for 8 hours. Would not recommend.
The stripper started talking about murdering people....that lapdance turned dark.....
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
Randomize
