he told me i looked like an animal then proceeded to kiss me
try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
I woke up on the side of the highway to the ppl in orange jumpsuits cleaning to comunity service. Not sure which freaked them out more... Finding a dead b ody or me not being dead
There was an audience eating triscuts and bananas in the bathroom while watching him puke. It was a good birthday.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Going to an AA meeting just so I can fuck him...That's dedication
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
she stole my Timberlands and my Sublime shirt and left her heels and bra. this is war
Dude, she set my Tinder preference to men, set the radius to 100 miles, and used up all of my right swipes. I think she's mad.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
Bring beers. The password is "I brought beers" but you can't come in if you're a liar
i'd like to schedule a penis for 4pm please.
MY DINNER LAST NIGHT CONSISTED OF SEMEN AND A PROTEIN SHAKE... MY TRAINER WOULD BE PROUD I DIDN'T HAVE CARBS!
Just let a guy I just met eat me out in a shed at a baby shower. May have sunk to a brand new low
Randomize