accomplished twins. life is a go
I never Thought the day id see a chick shove a 2liter up her vag. that happened last night
you need to leave class get on facebook and start untagging IMMEDIATELY
Judging by the fact that my hair was glued to my head with vomit, yeah I think I couldve used a friend last night
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
DONT TAKE THE KEG OUT OF THE HOT TUB I NEED A PICTURE OF ME DOING A KEG STAND ON IT
Just because you put plan b in my Easter basket doesn't give you an excuse not to wear a condom.
So the contents found in my winter coats this year: coat 1, condom and 10$. Coat 2, condom and 75$ check. Coat 3, 2.05$ and a sunflower seed.
Obviously coat 3 had the best time since you used the condom and all of the money
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
Miscalculate d the jungle juice, it's actually 10%. Can't taste the diff anyway but my stomcha is warm. Come play pongm.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My tights ended up on the driveway folded neatly. Any ideas how that happened?
I didn't know White Castle was open when your sober.
I'm super depressed and stressed and I just want spaghetti and sex...
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
Adderall went through the wash. Took it anyway. Wish me luck.
At Target. Everyone is stocking up on food and flashlights for this storm. I stocked up on beer. Dont judge me, it was on sale...
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