lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
when she started arguing that Girl Talk was in fact a DJ, i knew i could never sleep with her
Yay Minnesota! I can't believe there's now a US Senator who has taken more acid than we have
Where are you? I just made a vodka + cranberry & I’m going to drive there & throw it in your face
Not me. I think "beastiality" sounds pretty classy.
Her vagina turned into a vuvuzela. I didn't know it was a possible to have a wet nightmare.
He just called shotgun on the way to the squad car.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I have got to stop making out with redheads. I need to sign my life over to my dad like Britney Spears.
It's official, there's a sex tape of me floating around some high school
whiskey
stop
tequila
you're fuckin up my ability to be a agrown up
Well, thats the first guy to go to jail because of my vagina
Post that event on your timeline
Shirtless guy staggering down the sidewalk, puking into a Prada shopping bag. Ahhh, the walk of shame in Boystown.
I feel like I smell like bad decisions
Apparently i disappeared and no one found me until the morning , but i have fifty missed calls
Randomize
