Have u Seen that eharmony commercial where the guy goes " I don't know how I could love her anymore, but tomorrow I will'. Yeah that guy should kill himself
I intend to get homeless drunk
She better not be too drunk to operate a blowtorch
i have 90 minutes to kick this food poisoning or josh's first experience with buttsex will be his last
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
She's dipping the chocolate graham crackers in marshmallow vodka for a 'campfire taste'
There are cops on horseback in our back yard
I just took my birth control with Redi-Whip. I'm that girl.
Another development in my life...I think I pulled a muscle in my neck from vomiting this weekend.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
He has fairy lights round his bed.. And played Jamie cullum when we had sex... Hes batting for the other team right?
One a scale of one to hella drunk, how gracefully can I make it down those stairs
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
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