i have the same doorman on the day shift as the guyi shacked with has on the night shift. he just laughed at me when i came home this AM. FML
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
anyone who buys me chipotle gets an automatic hj
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
Most eventful shower ever. Jacked off, peed and puked in there.
I do remember getting hit in the face by an ugly one because she thought I was blowing on her butthole.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
My lower body still feels like its been through a garbage disposal and a trash compactor. In that order.
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
Nothing says happy valentines day like waking up to a naked man you hooked up with taking a walk of shame
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
I fell asleep with a half eating burrito in my hand and woke up to cat vomit with burrito in it.
My liver is preforming stress tests.
listen I will take literally anything I can get my tiny gay fingers on
Randomize
