would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
your cum blends into my yellow sheets :/
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
I feel like I had eight dicks in my mouth
Is it bad that my only regret is fucking on the bathroom floor and not the sink?
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
Romantic bubble bath turned into splash war. We can't be adults about anything.
i turned around and there he was, right in my face. i was mid deep throat of a hot dog that i was eating with my hands and no bun. you win FSU, you win.
The impromptu 'dance party' was just three white dudes flailing arrhythmically in the kitchen in absolute silence. Stone cold sober.
I stole an accordion from the bar
Accidentally
I'm having ragrets about stealing the accordion
Well, I got drunk and told my family about what I expected sexually after a good first date.
he bought me ice cream then took me home and fucked the shit outta me. you can't write this kinda romance.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
You ever stub your boner? It happened to me. Just know that drugs and strip poker and a hot tub. I'll Regale you with the story over drinks later.
Randomize
