I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
bathroom sex at kohls isnt as trashy as it seems
does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
Ya know, since we do have alot of sex with each other i figure i should wish you a happy valentines day
Let me begin to explain the rest of last night by beginning with saying that out if necessity I took a pair of your underwear
I think our prof has caught onto our drinking game. He burst into the room with a big smile on his face and yelled "essentially! Essentially! Essentially!"
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
you literally stared at me for three minutes and then said "hey this tequila isn't gonna drink itself, boss"
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
I just googled, "what type of cured meat does my face taste like", and one of the top results was, "The Definitive Guide to Bacon." I couldn't make this up if I tried.
Jamie's fucking a senior citizen and I'm eating chips and salsa in the shower at 2am, so whatever you're doing it can't be worse.
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
Randomize
