im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Literally 6000 elephants in my backyard.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just got home. Seriously all I remember is taking out my contacts and putting your balls in my mouth.
I just had a full choir singing the phrase pudding cup in my head. Too. Stoned.
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
I mean nobody wants to admit they ate 9 cans of ravioli but i did and i am not ashamed of myself
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may see me wearing your shirt to class. It's because I still have the spins and I'm anticipating throwing up on it. Asshole.
We have 24 days left before I leave for college and 21 condoms left in the stockpile. Are you up for the challenge?
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Haha i really think theres no better way to tell a paramedic sorry for breaking your nose than a beautiful and healthy edible arrangement...
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