Don't feel obligated to get back to me but I think I just fell in love with a middle aged waitress at the Dennys in waco. She's used but in good condition.
They past out watching a re-run of the 1984 presidential debate on cspan
All I need in life is some dick and a big mac.
its not that he announces that he can deep throat a banana its the fact he knows he can and it makes me wonder how he found out
Is it sad that I just used my electrical knowledge to not only fix but improve my vibrator?
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
how many thumbs am i supposed to have at one time
you found the shrooms didnt you
WHAT DID YOU SAW VERBATIM. VERBATIM IS SOBER FOR WORD FOR WORD
We're pretty much just dating until one of our ex's wants us back
I'm putting you on my Emergency card so i can spend the last ounce of strength in my hospital bed to flip you off.
I want to have sex with Will Smith. I guess I have a thing with 90s sitcom stars. Stamos, Joey Lawrence, John Goodman.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
TRY TO UNDERSTAND I HAVE MAGIC POWERS HOLY FUCKING SHIT
What's your fascination with fucking to the Lion King Soundtrack?
I'm on a walk of shame carrying YOUR pants. You owe me.
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