You are possibly the most enthusiastic, likable bad influence I've ever met.
shit is crazy. i just keep thinking that this kid growing inside Emily used to live in my balls.
going to class early so i have time to go on the moonbounce. this is why i go to art school.
i suspect the closest i'll get to a valentine this year is a 16 year old on chat roulette asking me to show my tits. step up from last year, i guess.
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Dude pussy is like music. For every person who pays for it, there are thousands more getting it for free.
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
The bartender seems to not like the DD's anymore. I'm sad
Come over. We're getting stoned and watching DogTV
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
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Finally met a man who appreciates my beer pong skills, definitely a keeper for the weekend
You know you were way drunk when you wake up at 7 AM halfway on a couch, tangled in a sheet with your shoes still on.
bitch, i have a flask. i've got things under control.
god. marry me.
Just got recognized as black out drunk girl. I'm never going to live that down, am I?
She just kept screaming and saying "fucking you is like fucking a mountain"
I talked to his mom for a good 10 minutes with coke all over my nose. Not the best first impression
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