i'm watching the tyra show: "women who beat up their boyfriends" - lets see how she can make THIS one all about herself too.
he said he doesnt sext because the government can tap that kind of shit too. no boobie pics for him.
all i remember is being at the diner with her at 3am and her storming into the kitchen to make sure the chef gave me regular fries instead of home fries.
BEER BONG IN THE STOCKROOM COME IN TO WORK TODAY
He said he had a problem he needed to take care of before we got omelets and then showed me his erection.
She face-timed me on the toilet. My dick is never going to recover from that.
She screamed at us, "You guys need to wake up and smell the beer-bong!"
Holy. Fuck. This mans mouth is magical. I love married men. I don't have to teach them.
I like the fact that you've for some reason taken my penis into protective custody
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
Well puke fest 2014 just happened
you got into a really intense arguement about protecting bees. it was wierdly arousing.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
Did I just pee in the Taco Bell parking lot?
Yep. But do you remember wiping with my quesadilla?
You cannot steal the fun of my nakedness. You do not own my nakedness. My nakedness is my sole property and I share that fun with whom I choose.
Randomize
