So I have to go swallow an entire zebra. Ur on ur own girl.
I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
Is it possible for Craig Seger to wear a normal suit and not look like an asshole on national tv?
yeah so our basement was flooded 4 feet. we just smoke and drank and then went swimming. gotta make the best out of it
The fact you even thought licking it would fix it boggles my mind
Well it worked
Not the point
i can't believe you were mixing vodka with green tea last night and enjoying it.
i should bottle and sell it. my slogan could be "green tea vodka. antioxidating while intoxiacting. your liver will thank you. "
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
You may have graduated college on time, but my 6th year ass gets to see awesome tits every day just for showing up.
Where is a good place to buy a New Year's outfit that acknowledges I don't have tits but screams I suck dick like a champ?
We're bowling witha frozen turkey in the hallway...ur missing out
I reek of vagina.. My cab driver commented.
I don't think I've ever had this many people offer me blow before. 3 o'clock on a Thursday. I keep good company.
Going through his web history. 10 hours ago he searched "how to put on condom with your teeth" I think I'm getting it tonight.
How much have you had to drink?
Qhaghao Oslo?
That seems like quite a lot.
Randomize
