i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I just queefed in yoga class and now the old man next to me is smiling at me.
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
hey boys, thanks for all the pictures of your dick you took with my camera last night...they were really nice to stumble upon while reliving my night in the breakroom today at work
Besides, I'm not in my 30's. I'm still allowed to drink wine from a bag.
he fucked my hip out of place.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I'll give you $10 to get a dick pic with a gecko on it.
On my way, five mins. Is the line long? Do you think they will they hold a pumpkin at coat check?
so the kid in line in front of me at walmart just bought roses and a Plan B pill. Happy Valentines Day.
Have you ever just sat there and thought about past penises?
He called my vagina his wife... how is that NOT creepy?!
I just had a 10 minute staring contest with my dog. Can you come over?