I have a masturbator in my 5th grade class. the teacher told me ever since they caught him humping the desk in 2nd grade, they haven't been able to control him. he's even on medication but he will just do it in class
Dude that chick had her name tattooed in Japanese characters between her b-cups. I kept calling her Toyota.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
Fastest blow job ever. Though it was probably a good thing since we were in front of my house.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i saw the poster for your lost tequila... what a shame
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
you are dancing on the line between undergrad and alcoholic.
Too many penises have met your hands. Stop or die.
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm face down in a ditch right now please help this is not a metaphor for my life this is real.
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
I swear to god my spidey sense only tingles when someone’s about to die or you’re being a hoe.
Randomize