okay pat passed out under dana's car
I think the phrase "bag of smashed assholes" describes it best
She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
It's been five and a half years since she and my brother stopped dating. I feel like that's a long enough grace period. Going for it.
Omg I'm so stupid. All the peoples fb status that said "spain" I thought they were all going to spain.......
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
There were 11 girls in that minivan and everyone was either puking, crying, or yelling "we're a total shit show"
Yeah dude. They were so drunk they actually drank the pool water. Which I'm pretty sure will kill them. My parents chlorine the shit out of that thing cuz they know how much sex my brothers have in it
Drinks appeared in front of me. Who am I to deny destiny? And by destiny, I mean free drinks, which appear by magic.
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Last night you sang a duet with a gay man posing as a straight man posing as nicole kidman; your life lacks neither color nor texture:)
I forgot her safe word. It was a rough night.
I don't care if he's the coolest coworker, if he's living in his mom's basement at 30 you should not buy drugs from him
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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