We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
It had been so long since my last time that it was easily a double helping of stomach pancakes. I think she was mildly impressed.
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Down at Ground Zero right now. So many people here. It's the most patriotic game of grabass Ive ever seen.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
Are taco bell cups microwave safe? I can't make that judgement right now
The fact that every guy you've slept with since you've lost virginty either have the same first or last name isn't normal.
I am drinking green tea.... My liver is in shock
If I die tonight, I want you to have the rest of my nachos. And my porn collection.
I just know what's gonna happen. I mean. I shaved my legs up to shorts length. But I'm leaving the rest as a sort of makeshift caution tape.
Then you're three pancakes deep in regret.
I only know one person in my class and that's my dealer.
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
when you shit yourself on the way to school its time to give up and go home
Randomize
