tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
I got otter pops to cool the beers, it's an all around better idea.
if by 'bottleservice' you mean 'bringing beers in my purse' then yes, we are.
Well i then put my mattress in my closet and am currently on it. This is a new one.
My roommate has every episode of Full House. I'm going to fail my midterm tomorrow.
Sorry for trying to force you and Robert to make out. I didn't realize how awkward it was until I woke up today.
We just did a shot to "getting laid in the bar bathroom". I love where this thursday is headed
All is not lost. The bondage chair came with repair seals and glue. It's like the knewwwwwww this would happen.
i havent blinked in 235 seconds. now 247. now 258. 263. 267. 271. i also have been gifted with theability to both type and count and not blink. 293 so magical
She just looked at him and said "I'm gonna fuck that" and it totally worked.
I'm going to superglue stuart's hands into socker boppers
If it carries over into the weekend I would be glad to nurse your vagina back to health.
I have a new game. It's called "how weird can you act before a guy won't fuck you". I've deducted most guys are willing even if you're batshit insane.
I am in the bathroom at work, pooing while eating pretzels. Hungover Fridays are in full effect
Listen, you can either give me drugs or an orgasm. You decide.
Randomize
