At a stoplight watching a woman push groceries in a stroller while dodging oncoming traffic... Reallllly Detroit?
the only good thing about these hospital visits are the free pregnancy tests
high in an attic. pig roast in 10.
I want to know him. He looks like he makes really good breakfast burritos.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
Haha, you kept saying the cop was going to give you a ride home b/c "that's his job, it's summer."
My mom would probably be ok with my lifestyle as long as she doesn't see that photo of me doing bong rips in a Jesus costume.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
When I was drunk texting him about three ways he seemed more interested in just seeing me. And that's when I knew something was wrong with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
mom is telling me the setting in which I was conceived
did you know we used to have a pool?
I kinda got drunk and threw my debit card into a bonfire so I don't have any money at the moment lol.
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
New fact of life: getting Becca high never helps any situation at all ever.
You're lucky I just like fucking you because you would really suck at being a boyfriend.
Is it weird that I shop for lingerie by thinking if it will look good on both me and your floor?
No. Not at all.
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