id tell you what to do, but my morals dont exactly scream, "Listen to this guy!"
I'm at the bar and I just saw some unnecessary and accidental cooter...sometimes I think girls need a license to go out pantyless in public.
She wanted to test if her costume allows her to still have sex in it. It does
I kept feeling my boobs..just to make sure they were still there.
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I feel like fucking him is something we all do but don't want to admit to. like masturbating or peeing in the shower
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
Just saw the guy I slept with last night in a bar. He gave me a high five and kept moving
Hey are you going to the pride parade? If so get me a shit ton of condoms
I definitely don't remember licking the drag queens boob.
It was a strange night. I made out with his college roommate and said "do you care?" beforehand.
You chipped your front tooth on the toilet bowl. Should I call your dentist?
I don't know what she did to me last night, but the scratches on my back indicate that I had sex with a Bengal tiger last night.
Randomize
