its awkward enough using a urinal next to your dad but its worse finding out hes one of the guys who goes no hands and moans it out
why didn't we just drop out of school years ago and become dominatrix bitches who beat men?
I don't know but we should still do that
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
the boobs are fake... i feel like i just found out santa isn't real.
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
And I was the only one who felt it was dangerous to set the tv and blender on the ledge of the hot tub
Btw, I'm creating an event on fb to celebrate the one yr anniversary since we went to jail.
We defiantly won best dressed in the ER tonight
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
I did however clean up the cupcakes and vomit so I'm not that bad of a roommate
He turned down head in favor of a handjob. Not sure if he's crazy or i have magic hands
You know it was one hell of a night when you need to use your own thong to wipe cum off your face.
He came and farted at the same time. My life is over.
Sometimes I look at dogs and just thing about how it's weird we both came from wolves
Lay off the drugs kid
I’m planning a Pharmasutra for the first night after the pandemic ends
Pharmasutra?
Me + Chris + cocktails + viagra = night of orgasms
Randomize
