Best part is I totaly had to get into my dads car like I didn't have my pants off two minutes ago.
We walk out of his house and his dad is there, so I had to meet him and shake his hand pretending that same hand hadn't been down his son's pants five minutes earlier
every time i send "do you want some cock" to her T9 manages to change it to "anal"...i think she's mad now
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The first song on his sex mix was "highway to the danger zone"
Never again will we have slut saturday. Never.
Is it weird that out of everything, Im most worried about chipping a tooth on his prince albert?
someone just drove by blasting livin on a prayer and threw like 6 bagels out the window... was it you?!
When did you hit me on the head with a stool?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
I am going to make your legs soar from cumming so much
Like they're going to fly away?
he fed me chocolate as I gave him a handjob. I felt like a princess.
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
congratulations on joining the accidental bisexual club
Never thought I'd see the day when I got assless chaps in the mail, and yet here we are...
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