dude she's married.
so? a ring don't cover no holes.
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
spotted: something called the tunnel of opression. i feel like if we patricipated we wouldnt even be phased or we could run it better than them
Now that I'm single, I like to think of myself as in a relationship with Taco Bell.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
Please stop letting me make out with hot lesbians.
Definitely not. I may be your best friend, but first and foremost I am a guy. Please continue.
You are one of my favorite baseball you have fun today
Possibly having a threesome with my ex boyfriend and his current girlfriend was great closure on that subject
When he wakes up tomorrow with half shaved legs smelling like a preteens bathroom, I'm sure he will think he has had a great evening
I'm drunk doing an ab workout. I can only hope I make it to bed tonight.
my liver is dry heaving
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
My professor is wearing skinny jeans, orange socks and just said penetration. I don't know what to think
Randomize
