so I just asked a Chinese man and found out our tattoos actually mean vagina...
I was up until 12:30 making that damned grammar test for my freshmen then I caught myself running through the verb tenses when I was giving him head.
"I have sucked, I will suck, I will have suck, I am sucking..." I've never felt more like a nerdier slut than last night.
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
you passed out when you kept trying to hold your breath during the underwater scenes of 2012
I just figured I'd let u know that you bought a yacht on ebay last night
just left the emergency room. condom extraction.
just found $310, wrapped in a rubber band, at the bottom of my sock drawer with a note attached stating, "Make it rain".
that was probably me. ive bitten a lot of people.
The port-a-pottys are knocked over so I have nowhere to sleep.
I'M ALSO PLAYING VIDEO GAMES AND THINKING ABOUT ORDERING A PJIZZA. I'M NOT SURE WHAT MY MUSTACHE WANTS.
so we were doing it and I was like umm hi im losing my virginity can you take off your beanie
Sorry i vommed in a cup next to u w out warning.. Actually im not that sorry cuz i didn't spill a drop LIKE A PRO
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
just played fuck the dealer and thunderstruck with my physics ta. he is the third ta that i have drank with this semester, i think i'm getting good at college
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