He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Canada is now making docos about life in America. Its called Trailer Park Boys.
a price tag just fell out of my vag. i guess its worth $13.99...
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
I'll just get wasted and start throwing myself at men. Someone's bound to take the bait
Thank you for getting us into that car accident. I have had more guys hit on me than ever before because of my broken fingers.
All right cuz right now I'm in one of those moods where the shear thought of doing anything more strenuous than making a sandwich has me wanting to curl up in the feeble position and splash around in a puddle of my own tears.
Whoever put the picture of my dad in the condom box is an asshole
Whenever I walk away from the group without saying anything, NEVER assume I'm just going to the bathroom.
I think it's safe to say I'm rolling my hypothetical balls off
We were escorted through the guys dorm by 5 kids with nerf guns and zelda shields. I felt like the president with a fucked up secret service squad.
My phone autocorrected "shhhhh" to "AHHHHHHHHH" and I feel like that says a lot about my life
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
Yeah, he threw a chair and hit her in the side of the head. She started hysterically crying and then proceeded to continue kicking our ass at beerpong. The girls got talent.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Randomize
