try this...when you orgasm scream his address including city state and zip...
We just made watching Intervention into a drinking game. We drink everytime someone does drungs.
just passed a tour group on my way home. the guide actually said: 'and THAT kids is whats known as the walk of shame'
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
all you kept yelling was "i'm bored and i'm sober"
It hurts to peel the glue off my chest and i keep finding glitter in my hair.
I just wanted to decorate you...
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
Just woke up in his bed wearing only his shoes. I don't know how to gently say hey dude get the fuck up and take me home....regardless these are some nice shoes.
No later than 4:00 ok - I'm tying my viagra high into a superbowl halftime showstopper. Ya, you might wanna look away for that
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just try to date guys based on what I need like I am trying to find an electrician now
You gays are geniuses
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
ever bang a guy wearing an $800 suit? today you will.
I feel like this is something I should shave my legs for
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
I'm still here... I feel so bad wearing your mom's cardigan at a strip club 🙈
Apparent my drunk ass was so dedicated to taking a piss, when I walked across the dance floor to get to the bathroom a 9/10 broad tried to dance with me and I just pushed her aside, like hard enough to send her a few feet from where she was standing, pointed at her and said "Not now chief, gotta rock a mean one."
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