i should go to a nude beach and wear just a condom, then ill have tan lines on my dick
To think... Somewhere, too drunk by buckcherry is someone's theme song
I feel like sober is me a distant relative that I only see on christmas..
Dude, just discovered frito and mozzarella nachos. Don't say I never contributed anything to this world.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Puking in one of the stalls, a guy ran in and started puking in the other stall... In between heaves we told each other our names; i found out that it was my old best friend that moved away in the 8th grade
There was a guy on the elevator dressed as santa in flip-flops giving away beer.
Can we promise no matter what that we have sex the night the Mayan calendar runs out?
She just made out with a golden retriever. I'm disgusted and turned on all at once
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
he walked up looked at my boobs then looked at my eyes then looked at my boobs again smiled and said "can I get you and the girls a shot "
He took me out, we slept together, and he sent me home this morning with fresh cantaloupe. #husbandstatus
You are a genius and a whore.
The adults are the big ones right?
He said my vagina smelled like pomegranates. Its like my vagina is the fountain of youth.
The cops asked Ben if he was drunk and he slurred "I'm man enough to admit that I am" with a southern draw
Randomize