you think thats bad? Today I had to pop a zit on my sack.
3 st and 6 ave. One dollar pitchers. Look out world.
If my vagina had boots, it would be shaking in them.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Hes a nice guy and all but I'm only interested in his drunken alter ego.
I also witnessed that same parrot perched on the head of a man grinding with a girl.
Interesting. As a girl I don't know how okay I would be with that.
She seemed pretty into it.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
Do you ever actually plan things? Or is it always drugs then whatever happens? I'm considering being worried about you
I may, or may not have licked his face in an Applebee's.
Nursing home in NJ just got busted for prostitution and drugs...dropping off my deposit tomorrow
So I found out me and this guy I was drinking beer with tonight both got lactated on by the same stripper. We're milk brothers.
Thank you <3 he just looked at me, fist bumped me, and asked me what was on my titty....we may cut her off
I need someone to play with my boobs. Even platonically. I just need a good groping
Hey I'm coming to get my gin do you want a good luck blowjob for your exam tmrw
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