Texts From Last Night

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  (312): View more from Illinois

  We're like a lot better than the average bears

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  (312): We're like a lot better than the average bears http://tfl.nu/6x8n
  Replies (1) Good night (1396) Bad night (588)
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  (253): View more from Washington

  oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body.

  (1-253): View more from Washington

  I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate.

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  (253): oddly enough my penis is pretty tan. the part of my body that gets the least amount of sunlight is tanner than most of the rest of my body. (1-253): I think its part of male evolution. Pretty soon they'll have diamonds on them and taste like chocolate. http://tfl.nu/e4ca
  Replies (71) Good night (5598) Bad night (574)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  dude she's married.

  (1-269): View more from Michigan

  so? a ring don't cover no holes.

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  (269): dude she's married. (1-269): so? a ring don't cover no holes. http://tfl.nu/8xdg
  Replies (42) Good night (5066) Bad night (1562)
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  (904): View more from Florida

  I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester.

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  (904): I can't ever handle being "that girl" again. At least not until next semester. http://tfl.nu/arpr
  Replies (9) Good night (1094) Bad night (2802)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR.

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  (541): I just saw a girl in Albersons in spandex and curlers buying PBR. Only PBR. http://tfl.nu/y3sk
  Replies (48) Good night (3359) Bad night (819)
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  (219): View more from Indiana

  I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives.

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  (219): I'm in a trailer park. But I'm not scared. The virgin always lives. http://tfl.nu/v9m4
  Replies (11) Good night (7778) Bad night (1282)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory

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  (541): we could easily be the first people to smoke 3 bowls and pound a Four Loco before goin on a tour of the Tillamook cheese factory http://tfl.nu/4fuz
  Replies (59) Good night (5470) Bad night (1004)
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  (919): View more from North Carolina

  we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.

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  (919): we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni. http://tfl.nu/1ccz
  Replies (3) Good night (3556) Bad night (1429)
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  (613): View more from Ontario

  Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.

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  (613): Will you be topless? That will affect my answer. http://tfl.nu/lf7u
  Replies (19) Good night (6159) Bad night (1013)
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  (336): View more from North Carolina

  christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms

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  (336): christmas break will be like the 25 days of orgasms http://tfl.nu/f1de
  Replies (27) Good night (5898) Bad night (1051)
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  (647): View more from Ontario

  Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.

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  (647): Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday. http://tfl.nu/6zuu
  Replies (3) Good night (2023) Bad night (632)
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  (402): View more from Nebraska

  We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.

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  (402): We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever. http://tfl.nu/2k0u
  Replies (7) Good night (2529) Bad night (607)
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  (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done.

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  (814): You leave me no choice. Your vagina is grounded. It can just sit there and think about what it's done. http://tfl.nu/ojtz
  Replies (31) Good night (2935) Bad night (787)
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  (623): View more from Arizona

  Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice.

  (1-623): View more from Arizona

  That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me

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  (623): Then I hope you find a set of extremely intelligent, flexible triplets in the ethnicity of your choice. (1-623): That is the nicest thing anyone has ever wished for me http://tfl.nu/ei2r
  Replies (8) Good night (2721) Bad night (608)
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  (862): View more from New Jersey

  This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom.

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  (862): This morning was so rough I can't even. I was cutting up vegetables for my omelet on the floor. THE FLOOR. I sat on the floor because I felt like I was gonna vom. http://tfl.nu/h7oi
  Replies (1) Good night (228) Bad night (379)

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