We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I'm eating dry tortillas on a mattress without a sheet. and i thought my life would change after graduation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Home. Barefoot. Drunk. Crying. Puked. Brushed teeth. Washed face. Dying. Need Cuddle.
You looked like my 4th grade science fair volcano project when you burped. Told you chugging a 40 would be awesome.
Me and Phil are just drawing pictures of thumbs in different costumes during lecture. I love being a senior.
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think my vagina is phsycic. All day it tingled and then BAM Channing Tatums look alike fucks me like ive never been fucked in my life.
Ever wonder what all the drugs you've ever done would look like put together?
Heaven. . It would look like heaven
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
she's p upset bro
Where is he. I have a sword.
You know your Halloween costume is slutty when you have to shave your pubes to wear it.
dude. I can hear the air.
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