I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
That's cool how's he been?
He got hit in the face with a beer bottle so he has two black eyes and 13 stitches.. He hasnt changed much.
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
It was also my first failed attempt at shower sex.
I told myself this year would be different, I wouldn't get "pee in a fish tank drunk".. Got to the girls house... Fish tank in her room.. 2 years in a row.. had to keep the tradition going
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
Wait, whatever happened to locking our vaginas in closets?
It was all fun and games until he noticed the hickey that he hadn't given me...
you know she was a bad idea when your mom offers to pay for an eHarmony account
You ripped my pants off and gave me the choice use it or lose it what was I suppose to do.
ok so i got home drunk and was cleaning my kitchen and i was shaking out the throw rug and dropped it out the window, i'm sorry
Dentist appt at 2pm get milk poured on my tits by 2am
A marvelous 12 hours
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
I did not get pleasing results from googling “Bob Ross goat”
Randomize
