Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
how much land on farmville do you have now? i sold all my shit to make room i need more money... these animals need to know I'm running a business not a charity.
she said her black crocs were her 'dress up crocs'
I was giving him head and when I deep throated him he screamed out "Ohh, top ten!"
he just payed for our date, after telling him I was leaving early to meet my fuck buddy. is there something lower than friendzone I can stick this guy in?
Her tits were the only thing that upgraded her from "no way in fuck" to "drunken mistake"
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
I don't get hangovers. Except once. And there is a massively epic story behind that, involving so much alcohol I should have died, and 13 raw hotdogs.
At 2pm we are having a MANDITORY house meeting about last night. ALL must be in attendance!
I'd like to review the planning and execution of the party to determine how we hosted a naked party, to determine how we can have more.
I would agree. Whose business is it if I like to guzzle vodka by the liter on my of time? Answer: mine.
I guess she was just worried I'd end up sleeping with you again
It's not too late to disappoint her you know...
The problem is that you are trying to hold on to some dignity. Let it go. I hope your rash gets better.
Your friend gave me you're number. I was the guy locked behind the book shelf.
I think you have the wrong number, but I hope you escaped your library-prison?
How do you know i dont look like i got attacked by a weedwacker on bath salts?
andy told me i got kicked out of the bar and was so drunk i forgot and got back in line. the bouncer was zero impressed
Randomize
