another moral hangover. fuck.
Woke up with puke in my bed and my pockets full of Tootsie Rolls.
Jealous.
There comes a time in every girls life when she must use her boobs for good instead of evil.
Your pregnant arnt you
due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
Bottle rocket just missed my head by about 3 inches. Of course I'm being safe
You guys tried to boil water to fill up the empty hot tub. After the fourth trip back with the kettle you gave up.
Just remember my house smells of thick cut bacon and I have a big dick.
I remember it because it was right after the sadness and right before the sluttiness. The calm before the storm if you will
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
I snuck out of his room and his roommate stopped me to tell me there was a condom stuck to my back
This is why you arnt allowed in pet stores
I just want you to know that i deffinately saw the baby clothes, and didn't freak out and still had sex with him. I'm going to hell.
U were so upset when the shower ruined ur nachos. I didn't kno what to do.
It is like...the most transformative hard on I have ever had.
Randomize
