He asked me if I "almost moaned"
He looks like the kind of guy that still collects pokemon cards
I just got sparklers from my secret santa. Drunken sledding just got to a whole new level of dangerous
at the gym hungover with vodka in a water bottle. don't say i'm not fulfilling my resolutions
We can't all go after the girl with the low self-esteem
I woke up locked in the bar...this has redefined partying.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
There's a drag queen here that reminds me strongly of you. You should try crossdressing.
Awkward drunk fist bump with the boss. Not sure if tomorrow will be weird or wonderful.
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
Now I don't feel like I'm sweating cheeseburger all the time.
just once i'd like to actually BE there for your crazy drunk stories instead of just getting the play-by-play by people who can't remember half of it
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
Randomize
