Theres a baby at this concert double fisting pacifiers. shes gunna do great in college.
On my way home from Vegas. Just realized my pants are inside out
girl is pretty boring. i'm gonna see if she'll let me finger her.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sleeping with two different guys who share a driveway is getting increasingly challenging to keep secret
He was pretty wasted I guess, but the crippled guy threw the first punch it was awesome
Dude, I fucked her last night with nothing but my bandana on. Like straight Indian chief style.
I can hear her moaning. I'm on some random guy's counter. He wanted me to cuddle but I said I didn't know how.
Her vagina felt like a fur coat. It was weird at first but I kinda liked it
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm promoting my liver to CEO of my body cause it clearly works harder than anything else.
Some guy walked in while I was taking a piss and asked me if I knew of a back way out of the bar. He looked pretty freaked out.
Someone just got pizza delivered to the liquor store.
The people at subway are so judgy when you stop to get a sandwhich on your walk of shame
We couldnt find you anywhere and when you finally answered your phone all you said was "im safe"
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
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