PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
she got pretty angry when i tried to superglue her fingers together.
He's bringing condoms over for me in case we "bone".... the fact he calls it boning is not a great start.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's official, I need to start putting my vagina's needs before my own.
Well girls crying gets you hard so you're not really a good standard to me
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
I emailed the police apartment to apologize to the officer from last night. I practically threw a hissy fit because he wouldn't hug me.
It was "against protocol"
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
went out last night. woke up with a lisp.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
How do I tell this guy that if he does not like the condoms at my apartment, he should bring his own without sounding like a sure thing?
Say it's BYOC night at the beach. And, you are a sure thing. Own it.
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize