Just heard the new 'We are the world' ... Can I get my 10 bucks for Haiti back?
i had to write a bad check to buy franzia last weekend. i have my priorities in line.
Remeber when I drunkenly made out with him this summer while he was getting bitched at by his girlfriend on the phone? Yeah, neither do I. But I'm pretty sure that same thing happened again last night.
at the time it didn't seem likely that you would ever find the cake in your underwear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sometimes I wonder if my parents know that I mean horny when I say lonely.
That's the only definition of lonely that I know.
He said that he didn't know what level the sun was on, and then he puked.
I was worried he'd break you after the hiatus your lady parts had to take from social interaction.
Holy fucking shit the worst thing for a hangover ever--A FUCKING BOLLYWOOD MOVIE BLARING IN CLASS
I woke up naked under desk at her apt once during my freshman year. I should have known that friendship was of a different breed...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That happens a lot to the people around me. It's like I'm radioactive but instead of cancer, you get desensitized to the word cunt
Easy. Go to walmart, buy a bag of charcoal. everyone gets a present and it's cheap.
I keep finding Kraft singles in his pockets. Honestly, this is the weirdest family I've ever worked for.
Dude what is wrong with me. I'm like a strong independent woman and shit.
He just showed up in boxer briefs and loafers with only his phone and condoms
I’m tired of his bullshit and premature ejaculation. I’m going to hotel bars and finding a guy who is DTF
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