Thanks for last night it was amazing as always
What are you talking about
You've got to be kidding me
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
I thought we agreed, no more super glueing action figures to my dick
We should probably avoid doing this again, but hey it was a nice one time thing to tell the grandkids about... Hopefully they don't end up being YOUR grandkids.
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Well I'm currently debating between getting toilet paper or getting my eyebrows waxed so... There's that
This was the first time I've ever pushed myself until I vomited. Sorry, random couple laying on a dock at 8:30am. I would have picked a better spot so you didn't have to watch/listen to me vomit, but you guys were being MAD quiet. I had no idea you were there.
ok NEVER tell the strippers its your birthday. i think i have to burn these clothes and take a bath in bleach
This is the beginning of the end. Testicle Tuesdays and free ball Friday are going to scar people for life
Dude that picute of your balls will haunt my nightmares
Nothing says I'm committed to you for all eternity like letting him wear crocs to the wedding
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
She meowed at me. Repeatedly. Then she asked what was wrong with me because I didn't understand her.
And on the 323rd day without sex, God finally said let there be light...or love?
Randomize
