somebody snuck up and got me drunk
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
Funny favor to ask you... can you ask James to ask Chris if he came in me ? Trying to assess whether or not I need plan B.
His mom always writes on my facebook right after we have sex. it's like she knows. with her scary mom psychic powers
I fell asleep on the bus and woke up in Italian Las Vegas. Europe was a successful continent for me.
Idk, you were a drunk pirate that kept stealing pieces of people's costumes to keep as your booty.
That would explain all the random shit in my room...
apparently domino's not only has a live feed of pizzas coming out of the oven, but it also has a built in smooth jazz radio station. this pizza's getting really pornographic really fast.
And then she sprinted three blocks through live traffic towards McDonalds screaming "THE GOLDEN ARCHES ARE CALLING ME"
if i get arrested im counting on you to get a picture of it
literally who communicates this much post-hookup why r u like this
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
Just a little drinking. So much fun and love. The world is a shiny wonderful sphere in the sky so why shouldn't we celebrate?
I gave her a cheerful high five and she turned to me and said, "we should do that with our genitals." I may have to marry this girl.
The economy cant be that bad, I willingly got fired to bang her again.
I put on a face mask and masturbated for an hour... my face now has a green tint
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