If i die in the snow, get to my laptop and delete all of the nickelback. password is "barry"
as in "white"?
Sorry for calling you a whore in front of your mom. World cup brings the worst out of me.
whoever threw up in my shampooo bottle is totally getting defriended on facebook.
i tried to stop you. you just kept saying your split ends needed punishment.
No she hasen't showed up to my place yet, last I heard she was puking as she was walking without stopping near the park.
There's a pair of socks on the bar. No-one's questioned this.
My bed became a clown car for his family....I'm not ready to get married
This just became a night full of adventures...and by adventures I mean hitting people with my car
Weirdly I'm doing ok, but I've tested positive for chlamydia, I wanted to let you know
Your cock deserves a montage
he has this weird thing where he watches me pee
Dude you of all people would miss her giving him a handjob in front of the whole party
I don't think that calm, have their shit together people actually exist.
I want to sit on top of her nipple mountains and reenact the Ricola commercial.
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
My hairdresser won’t do keratin treatments because of the toxins, but will put ecstasy up her butt at festivals...
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