I just tried to unlock my house with the car remote
this girl and her friend just showed up at my house. standing together, theylook exactly like the number 10. this has cockblock written alllllll over it.
I am at the gas station and there is a whole amish family here I'm not sure why the amish need gas but I think its worth investigating
no. the fact that it's halloween completely overrides the fact that it's sunday. youre going out whether im dragging your boring ass or not.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Wtf. I just got invited to a threeway bj session in the bathroom at boiler. Lmao
He's like Medusa, you can't look directly into his eyes or you'll turn into a slut.
My dads not up on pop culture but he's not dumb enough to believe your 2 girls 1 cup reference at dinner was from the bible.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
Even worse we were making a sex tape so our reaction to the condom breaking was recorded.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
Remember when we were coked out at that house and we were trying to meditate in the bathroom? Who's house were we at?
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
All I've done today is make sangria and wonder what the hell I'm doing with my life.
My left boob kept making random appearances last night.
Shes the whorey leader of that wolf pack, and all the less whorey wolves report back to her. She teaches them the ways
Randomize