I cant believe we actually had a nipple party!
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
I'm at the house listening to vengaboys alone. Please come home.
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
tell me how a rose bowl party involves waking up to find a raccoon in my kitchen cabinet eating my oreos the next morning?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
Her boobs more than make up for all the flaws with her personality.
i just went to use the bathroom this morning and I couldn't because there was someone puking in every stall. i'm going to miss the dorms this summer
Your remote is drenched in lotion and you expect me to believe you weren't masturbating?!
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
I feel like as your wife, as cool with your decision-making skills as I usually am, there should be a bigger explanation to you adopting a child while I'm in Houston.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
WHY IS IT FROWNED UPON THE DRESS UP IN CAT COSTUMES AND SIT OUTSIDE OF BARS WITH A BOX OF WINE I THOUGHT THIS WAS AMERICA
Between having seen you naked and interpreting your values based on the occasional political FB post, you're no stranger for sure.
My niece I'm babysitting left earlier to stay the night with her friend. I got ditched by an 8 year old.
Randomize
