I look better un-naked...
so i woke up on my toliet naked backwards. good night.
you know you were refereeing rock paper scissors for who got to make out with your sister right?
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
maybe these stereotypes wouldn't come up if you would stop taking body shots off another
The amount of knuckle children I've had to the Farrah Abraham sex tape is disturbing and impressive
The beer shits the day after completing the World Beer Tour at Epcot are just as epic as the tour itself.
Dude she smelled like bar-b-que sauce. I can't think of anything better.
THANKS BE TO BLACK BABY JESUS IN HIS LITTLE GOLDEN DIAPER FOR BLESSING ME WITH NOT PREGNANT
Woke up next to a half eaten Philly Cheesesteak. Honestly probably one of the top 3 things I've ever woken up next to.
Is there an "I fucked your brother" emoji?
I can't remember what I did last night, but judging from the state of my hair I had a pretty good time.
I had just gotten to his place and was about to get some dick. No way was I gonna let her negative attitude affect my orgasm feng shui
Last time we had sex i was dressed like a ninja turtle and someone else was in our bed, so this time should be fine.
I hope ur kiddin
wish i was
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
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