they need to just BURY HIM!
It's sad how good I am at giving people diseases
Best text conversation ever. Other than the one we had about using blood for lube.
I think if I could use my boobs as a second pair of hands everything would be ok
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
I just bid on a $9000 car because I think its my ex-girlfriends. Yes I wanna hit that again.
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
I keep looking at his nude pics and crying because ill never see it in person again.
Well, my eyeball is red and the rest of my eye is black. Oh the joys of drinking with u. PS- I laid in a pile of sawdust. it was ok at the time.
I opened the door and his girlfriend was standing there; we made silent, prolonged eye contact as I quietly put on my panties and left.
Most drunken moment of the night is me pouring Chanel no. 5 all over your boobs and rubbing it in...
After the apocalypse all we'll have is vodka and twinkles.
He's a drill sergeant! The sadomasochist in me can't resist that.
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
For the love of all that is holy just take the tranquilizers Erica
Randomize
