Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
mornings like this make me wish i was morman.
He gave his mom his old phone, and I am SO paranoid
Did you send adult things?
Um. Yes would be the understatement of the year
he stopped mid-fuck to ask me how my day was....
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out my brother beats off to Lauren Conrad. the Hills will never be the same.
It didn't go so well. He got drunk and asked my dad if 'front or back' virginity mattered more.
I don't remember much but I remember it was a unanimous decision that Santa was indeed real and Cait's stripping somehow proved this.
i left the icescrapper in his bathroom. i dont remember taking it there, but i remember brushing his hair with it.
You know you gotta reevaluate your life when the first thought that comes to mind after you wake up is 'at least I'm still alive'
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You're not married and none of these idiots are committing to you so whore it up on whore island
Can we go to pirate hooker whore island then
But I made it seem like I wasn't hungover at work, so that's a plus.
Currently eating Dominos at the bar high as shit so that's how homework is going
You ruined the universe
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Want a bet? I'm a kinky and determined motherfucker with a libido that is not easily stopped
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