Sitting next to a retarded hot married man on the plane, I got 6.5 hrs to homewreck this shit.
just to let you know coffee and vodka was a bad way to start the day
you started introducing us as kentucky and gentlemen
The interviewer had a hook for his right hand I TRIED TO SHAKE HIS HOOK WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
Y'all best leave this "I can only have a couple drinks" shit at the door. U don't drive to Yukon to have a shot. I'm getting u fuckers drunk.
Really? A fat girl?
I'm walking her back. Chill out.
She is a nice girl okay. For some reason we are in my room though.
I don't think the TSA would be too happy. Who knows if three ounces of lube will be enough for us?
no, you don't understand how much people deal here. All I had to say was "hey lets buy a bag" and he pulled over instantly, then the randoms in the car behind us pulled over and sold us a bag.
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
Of course I fucked him. He's a professional beat boxer, his entire job is to do complicated shit with his tongue.
I was supremely disappointed in the lack of dick and doughnuts in my life last week.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
you never know when your going to find a surprise from me in your bed...it keeps you on your toes.
She's throwing a party for a guy that just got out of rehab?
Randomize
