Plan B is the new Plan A
My face smells like vagina and Im on my way to court. Fuck.
she actually told me to ignore the cokeheads in the corner with knives.
We had sex in the woods. It was great until some bird started mimicking my orgasm sounds
I feel like the only solution to this is to get naked and lay in the shower for a hour then see what my penis wants to do.
omg he fucking fingered me this morning. and i was just like this is the most awkward alarm clock ive ever had
Whiskey + Water + Crystal Lite does NOT = refreshing summer time drink.....
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
u r missing out we r watching a tranny direct traffic in a gstring
The same guy who pierced my nipples just told me he can help tutor me in precalc.
i don't find him as attractive when he's dressed as himself...bring back Indiana jones and I would so fuck him again
I need a life alert for his random dick pics. My heart can't handle that.
Omg in one week, two guys with their own names tattooed on their bodies had their tongues in my mouth. Self loathing shall commence now.
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Randomize
