so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
So she just apologized to the fire extinguisher.
Hey, did you take me to hospital last night?
IDK DUDE BUT HE TIED IT WITH A SHOELACE SO I GOTTA FREE SHOELACE OUTTA THE DEAL. THIS GIVES A NEW MEANING TO LACED DRUGS
I worked hard to give you that boner. No one else should get to enjoy it!
The shrooms have turned on carrie. Change of plans. We're getting stoned and finding bacon.
My RA just sigh me high as fuck acting like a zombie and scratching at my door. Thoughts?
If someone plays phil collins i'm gonna take off my clothes
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
…wtf were in those pills mom gave me
That awkward moment when you're drunk enough to crave cocaine, but you're sober enough to know it's only Tuesday.
Ok, you agree to the terms? We can have sex, but this doesn't mean we're back together...it just means we're working on things. Got it? Sign here.
His butt is perfect. Like a twelve on a scale of one to ten. No idea about his personality or anything but that ass... I'm keeping him.
Randomize
